Friday, May 20, 2011

Come to my Window!!!

I hit the wall of exhaustion this morning...so if this makes even less sense than my last post, I apologize ahead of time...lol.
First of all, thank you all for the encouragement and hilarious comments...totally made me giggle and I have learned this week that giggling is important. Even in the midst of chaos and stress and worry and exhaustion.......giggling is a good thing.

I've learned that this off-schedule week is also affecting the cat....I catch myself staring at her/him (not sure if I have mentioned this before or not, but our cat is actually a boy...but Emma wanted it to be a girl...go she declared it to be so and named it Daisy. Then when we got it fixed...Emma said that it TRULY is a girl now because it got it's "wagon" fixed! lolol..as in I'll fix yer wagon!") and seeing that familiar sleep-deprived/just woke up from a nap look in it's eyes.

I did my first site change yesterday. My hands were shaking like a kid hopped up on one of those giant pixie stix sugar straws. Emma only shed a couple of tears. It took me about 10 minutes to do the whole thing. I thought about doing it all day and then when it came time to do it, my mind was blank. So....I popped in the DVD that Animas sent me with the pump and I followed along with it step by step...play, pause, do it...play, pause, do it....etc etc etc. We survived! I didn't hurt her!

I'm finding with the pump that I am finally able to see how Emma's body reacts to food and insulin at specific time frames. I feel like I'm no longer shuffling along blindly guessing and assuming how things are going to work. I don't know if it will continue to be this obvious to me forever on the pump or not....but for right now anyway, I am loving being able to see the patterns more clearly. It's like I have a little glimpse inside the window to her pancreas...HA!...how's that for poetic justice? I would like to stick my tongue out at it through that window...maybe flip it the bird...maybe even shoot it the moon....lolol. But I am glad that I at least have that window now. I am going to keep my closet stocked in Windex to make sure that window can stay nice and clear from here on out. I walked around in the dark for so long, that now that I have this window and this insight...I don't want to let it go.

5 comments:

  1. Full on moon, baby...it totally deserves it!! :)
    Glad things are going well. That first 'on your own' change can be daunting. That's awesome that you had a video to help you!
    Go find a warm patch of sun and take a nap...oh, wait, unless the cat got there first!!

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  2. Yup, the pump definitely lets you see a little bit more of what's going on as opposed to MDI. And soon you will be a pro! It's always a little nerve-wracking and shaky when you do those things the first time around. I remember when I did my first insertion for the pump and my first for the sensor...I read over the instructions multiple times and did everything so slowly. Good luck! :)

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  3. You're totally selling me on the pump even with your exhaustion...maybe that's because I like Flo. :) I want a window too!

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  4. You will be doing site changes in seconds flat soon. I think I could do one in my sleep! (wait, I think I am always asleep so yes, I do them in my sleep!) Hmmm, that reminds me, I was supposed to change Bryce's set tonight...guess I will do it first thing in the morn. Hope i don't forget cuz we are leaving for a diabetes symposium super early (yes, 9am is early!)
    ok, it is bedtime, I am rambling!

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