Being a grown-up is hard...all of the personalities, emotions, responsibilties...everything. This past weekend I have unfortunately realized that something my Dad said to me when I was somewhere around 8 years old, is totally and completely true. My Dad talked to me a lot about life actually. He taught me a lot about how people are and about what is really truly important. I am lucky to have him. He means the world to me and I love him...he's my hero. He was talking with me one day about friends and acquaintances and other assorted life experiences. He told me that I would be lucky, if in my entire lifetime, I had enough friends to count on one hand. The rest would just be acquaintances. At the time, I thought...ya right Dad! You are crazy and really have no idea what you're talking about...I have TONS of friends! Well, over the years I have learned this lesson over and over again. Each time I learn it doesn't make it any easier really. In fact, the more it happens...the more it discourages me. I wish there were more people out there that actually gave a crap about things other than themselves. I am so tired of meeting people and becoming "friends" with people who are only out to see what they can get from you...to see what you can do for them...to tell you all about their problems and never once ask how you are or what they can do to help you. It's driving me crazy and starting to make me rethink the point of wanting to even bother wasting my time on anyone other than my family. The vast majority of people in this world just take take take and then hold their hand out wanting even more. It's a sad thing really. I wish I could stop learning this lesson.
I know that I have a lot on my plate in life. I have a lot of things spilling over into other things on my plate. That's just the way things are. The one constant thing though that affects absolutely every single thing on my plate and every single thought in my head and every single decision I make....my daughter...and the fact that she has diabetes. Her health will come before absolutely any other thing out there in the world. Hands down...no question...don't even bother trying to convince me otherwise. If I am your friend, i will be there for you and listen to you and help you as best I can. But the health of my daughter will always be the number one priority in life for me.
I know I will probably wake up tomorrow in a better mood...having the sun come out and seeing Emma's smile. But for now, tonight....I am disappointed and discouraged by the way most people are. So, BLAH to that....i think i will go wrap some Christmas presents...maybe that will help.