Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Awww phooey!!!....it's just not the same

Sometimes I have a smart mouth...ok...MOST of the time I have a smart mouth. I am sarcastic and I have a tendency to swear (unless I don't really know you...or if you are over the age of 70 like my Grandma...and then I try to reign it in and say things like "what the heck?!" instead of "what the f-word?!") I know, I know...swearing is bad...but sometimes I just can't help it. For example, when I am frustrated beyond all belief at a high blood sugar that comes out of no where...saying things like "Awww phooey!" just doesn't give me that same sense of releasing my anger as when I respond by saying "Awww S-word!" instead. Honestly, I think if that is my biggest fault in life, then I am doing pretty good.
In any case, I have realized something that I do and it makes me wonder if I should stop it. On occasion when I check Emma's blood sugar and I get a really stupid number that I wasn't expecting, I will comment with something along the lines of "Curse you pancreas!" or "why are you mocking me, diabetes?!" or just the general incoherent groan. Usually Emma will laugh hysterically at my response. Mostly because for some reason she thinks I am hilarious....and also because she herself has sort of a sick sense of humour that causes her to giggle at other people's grievances. She finds it funny when other people trip up the stairs (which I mean, who doesn't really?), she laughs when it's MY turn to go to the dentist cause she knows I hate it there (which is extra funny to me today, because I am leaving in about an hour to go get her from school for HER turn in the dentists chair! HA!), she snickers away at the thought of me circling the parking garage at the hospital searching for what seems like hours for a parking spot...somewhere...anywhere...only to find that the only open space is on the roof...in a huge puddle...farthest away from the stairway going down to the sidewalk. Yep, she is the sweetest kid on the planet...she has a heart of gold...she is a super well behaved child, but she has a twisted sense of humour already at 7 years old.
Anyhoo, back to my problem...i am wondering if I am scarring her inner psyche or emotional mentality when i make comments like that about her diabetes or her blood sugars? I'm wondering if I am doing harm to her mental health by making jokes or being sarcastic? I wonder if I should stop it? Or am I actually doing some good with my sarcasm and jokes? Am I teaching her through my comments and actions that life doesn't really have to be all that serious ALL of the time...even with diabetes? I just want to point out before I post this and I invite the judgement...that I would not and have not ever said anything mean to her or about her regarding her diabetes...that is totally not something I would ever do...I love her more than anything in this world. I only want to try and make her laugh during a stressful time. When she laughs, it makes my world a better place.


  1. I'm right there with you on the swearing. It doesn't come through on my blog, but lighter language just doesn't cut it sometimes...most of the time?! :)

    I'm conflicted over your question. On the one hand, if Emma gets your humor, then she will totally understand your remarks, and you might be showing her a simple, and perhaps helpful (and dare I say therapeutic?), way to blow steam and vent frustrations over D.

    On the other hand, if she doesn't fully understand your perspective, she may be perceiving negativity and possibly harboring resentment or guilt for making you feel the way she perceives you feeling.

    Talk to Emma. Make sure she knows where you're coming from. Go with your gut. You know Emma best. Maybe you need to silently tell D to f*ck off. Maybe it's okay for her to hear you and know that it's okay to get annoyed and/or frustrated, but to see how it's good to make light of a stressful situation and to see it's what comes next (how you further react) that really matters. Do what you think is best.

  2. Humor is a gift; sarcasm can be one, too, if it's understood. From what you've said, Emma is one of the lucky ones that already 'gets it' and can even 'give it.' I say if it's working, keep on making comments. I do agree that it might be in your best interest to make doubly sure Emma understands, though, just to be on the safe side.
    I've had to change some of my reactions to Bean's numbers because she can be overly sensitive and I don't want her to think that my frustration at the number is anyway towards her.
    Oh, and I totally agree...sometimes the situation warrants a WTF when D is in the mix!!

  3. I don't think you have anything to worry about as long as she understands her disease as much as possible :)

  4. By the way, she is ADORABLE!!!!

  5. Having read a ton of your posts, I doubt you are in anyway scarring your daughter with your sarcasm. You seem to be one of the most caring and loving moms out there with such a wonderful and special relationship with your daughter. If she giggles, great...now if she was breaking down in tears, that would be another story!

  6. thank you so much everyone for the comments!! It is so hard sometimes worrying about how much this disease is actually affecting her mentally and emotionally as well. Thank you for reassuring me that we are doing ok :o) I am so greatful to have all of your input!