Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Mad Max, Tina Turner, and Flo

It's nice to know that I can always count on my good buddy Flo when I need her to take over. She's always kinda lurking around there on my shoulder..just hanging out...watching me do most of the work while she sits back in her lazy boy recliner eating a bowl of fruit loops and reading the latest issue of Crazy Lady Digest. Whenever the stresses pile up to capacity for me and I need some help...she is right there to step in. For example.....
This afternoon was our 3 month clinic appointment. Joy oh joys! Definitely not one of my most favorite places to be on the planet...but we have to go...so I slap a cheesy grin on my face for Emma and off we go. My husband is working a different shift this week and needed the car, so he drove me to pick up Emma at school and then drop us both off at the hospital. We walked in and took our usual spots in the waiting room. Emma sat there coloring and trying to play some sort of I Spy game. I sat there staring at the same old posters and paintings that I have stared at once every three months for the past three years. Another Mom and kid sat across from me while we waited...I gave the obligatory smile and nod that we all do when forced to sit in close proximity with strangers. I sat there and couldn't shake the feeling that someone was staring at me...not just that little glance kind of stare either...it was a full blown assault of the eyes really. I could "feel" the other Mom staring away and it was driving me nuts. I'm ok with starting up a conversation with people to pass the time...but if they are just gonna sit there and stare at me like I'm some sort of monkey in the zoo swinging from my tail....then I'm not really in the mood to introduce myself and find out anything about them.
So...instead...crazy Flo decided to take the wheel for a while and came up with the idea to stare back...however, not stare directly back at this other Mom...just stare slightly off to the side of her head....and see how long until she reacts. Yep....that was my entertainment for the afternoon.
Blah blah blah...clinic went just like it always does. We left and had to phone a cab to bring us home seeing as how my husband had the car at work. Well, we hop in the cab and are on the way home when all of the sudden I hear a strange beeping noise EmmaNating (heeheehee...i love using that now) from my daughter's belly. At first I thought I was hearing things and just decided to ignore it. I mean seriously...there are so many devices we have in our lives that beep or ring or play a little tune at random...it's kinda hard to keep track sometimes. Well, minutes later Emma's belly started beeping again! She noticed it too this time and took her pump out of her pouch to look at it and informed me that the battery was low. Sweet...here we are in a cab still quite far from home...and I remembered reading that once that alarm goes off, I only have 30 min. to change the battery. It was a race against the clock...crazy cabbie guy at the helm steering us through rush hour traffic with the skillz (yes...i spelled that with a "z" on purpose...lol). I mapped out my plan of action ahead of time...go in house, put numbing cream on Emma's belly (because it was also site change day today!), flip open my Animas book and learn how to change a battery, start dinner, wash of numbing cream, change battery, change site, finish dinner, Ka-POW! Done....done....and done! We did it. Flo had us giggling the whole time with her color commentary. (by the way...i hope everyone knows that I seriously do not have multiple personalities...lolol...i joke about Flo...it's all in fun) Saying things like "Time's running out folks! Can she do it? Will she get the new battery in there on time? Or will she have to do the walk of shame?" and singing tunes like "We don't need another herooooo! We don't need to know the waaaay hooooommme! blah blah blah blah blah blah...the THUNDERDOME!" lolol...apparantly managing multiple diabetes/pump related tasks at once is done best while channeling my inner Tina Turner and singing songs from "Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome" or whatever that movie was called....
Most days I feel like I don't know what the hell I am doing. Most days I feel out of control and lost.
Not today.
Today I kicked some diabetes ass.
I won today.


  1. I don't think you're on Medtronic, but I know my pump lets me go more than a day without changing the battery (and yes, I know this though pure laziness). Not sure how it is for other pumps, though!

  2. Flo is back!!! I love Flo!!! :) The fact that "she" stared back at that lady is hilarious!

    EmmaNating is funny, too!

    Your cab ride reminded of the Amazing Race. Glad you made it and kicked some diabetes ass!

  3. ahahah OMG i laughed. so funny. flo is my idol... when im going nuts at 9.30am KNOWING its too early to pour a vodka on the rocks, im like crazy lady flo's twin seperated at birth. i then do D care with ease and poise and grace, funny rhyming songs (no tina turner, but more like 'this is the way we change your nappy, give your test, and draw up insulin, this the way i give the needle, early in the morning....!'

  4. Oh, honey, I love me some Flo!! Totally love that you 'stared' that woman down! ;)
    I so need to sing some of those silly songs to lighten the mood from time to time!!

  5. Everybody can use a little "Flo" in their lives. Don't ya think? AND way to kick some "D" butikus!

  6. you crack me up!
    You should have more than half an hour after getting a low batter alarm. We've waited more than a day before...since the Ping needs to fully rewind, etc, and loses IOB info, we try to only do the battery change in the morning. We've never had it "die" on us (knock on wood) Not that I would recommend waiting, just saying you don't need to stress out. ;-)