Just like yesterday, I know today that my daughter still has type 1 diabetes.
I know that she still has to check her blood sugar multiple times a day.
I know that she still has to count every single gram of carbs that she puts in her mouth.
I know that she still has to give herself insulin for every single one of those carbs because her pancreas still does not make its own insulin anymore.
I know that she still is at risk for high blood sugars and low blood sugars to occur...sometimes for no rhyme or reason.
I know that the possibility of her having a low blood sugar and dying is still very real...very possible.
I know that possibility is still very raw and very dangerous and very scary.
I know that it's still possible for me to kiss her goodnight and tuck her in bed at the end of the day and have that be the last time I see her smiling face because its still a real and honest possibility that she could die in the night from dead in bed syndrome.
I know that she still will struggle with not feeling like she fully fits in..or that she feels like she is just like her friends that don't have diabetes.
I know that her diabetes will be in the way sometimes and will try to stop us from making her life as normal as possible.
I know that I will still get up in the middle of the night, creep into her room, and jab a needle into her fingertip while she sleeps to check her blood sugar to make sure she's ok.
I know that I will still panic when she sleeps at a friends house.
I know that I am still afraid of the eventual teenage years with diabetes.
I know that I am still unbelievably proud of her and in awe if her and admire her and respect her and laugh with her and enjoy the in between moments with her and love her unconditionally forever and always no matter what.
I know that I still am doing the best that I can to be her pancreas.
I know that I will never stop....
Until my dying breath...
I know that she will still live her life with diabetes.
I know that she will still have hopes and dreams and fears and victories and failures.
I know that she will still have her heart broken and she will still speak her mind.
I know that she will still have goals and she will accomplish them no matter what stands in her way...
including, but not limited to diabetes itself.
Just like yesterday, I know that I will still educate myself and others, raise funds, advocate for her rights as well as others just like her.
Just like yesterday, she still has type 1 diabetes....
And I am still a D-Mom....
and there's nothing stronger or more determined than that.